iWrite

2007-05-21T08:50:00.001-07:00

In line with the recent enbloc frenzy, this blog's owner has decided to jump on the bandwagan and house her words in another place.

See you at

http://dressnride.wordpress.com

2007-05-19T10:38:00.000-07:00

I have been been clocking in unhealthy bed-times of close to 5 in the mornings for the past 2 nights, only because I simply couldn't put down The Kite Runner. I started reading the 340-page ficticious novel on Wednesday, and I have been hooked on it ever since. I finished the book early Saturday morning.

It was great.

I half-suspect that the book was dipped in a pot of old magic just before it reached my hands, because it felt like an invisible cord was released and looped around me as I took in the first few words of the story. I was kept incessantly wanting for more as I read on, as though a taut rope was pulling me along the plot non-stop through the flurry of words, like running rapidly through a dense field of overgrown grass in summer.

What a heart-wrenching novel. It's the kind of story that manages to thread its way deep into you, and makes your internal system curl up whenever you think of it simply because it has touched you right in the crevice of your heart.

It's the kind of book that makes you sad that you have finished reading it. Now when I see the novel lying innocently on my table, its simple and well-kept appearance deceptive of the whirlwind of a world it contains inside, I find my eyes lingering on it for just a little longer.

In that moment, I am reduced to a little girl standing outside a sweet shop that has closed down for good. I stand, in a faded flowery dress with a white collar, one hand twirling the stray thread that hangs from the lacy hem of my dress, and the other playing with my hair, I stand, head slightly tilted to the side, peering coyly through the window.

Church today was awesome. While we were worshipping, it felt as though the Heavens opened as a massive cloud of singing and sincere hearts rose, rose, rose, and presented itself to the King of Kings.

Thanks guys, for making it happen. For all the effort, thought and time put into making the service special. There was just such a wholesome and complete feeling about service today. Thanks, guys. :)

Sometimes you don't realise how much you have missed a person until you start talking again. When the hearts open, when the truth comes out, when all the feelings come rushing back.

Tonight's time spent together reminded me of the very first telegraph connection that spun off the entire telecommunication journey. Ours was just like that connection over time and distance, strong enough to carry the message "What hath God wrought?" in the most sincere way possible.

It was a great night together, A. I know I have told you many times tonight, but I'll still say it again. I've missed you. And it feels really good to have you back in my life. Really.

Just very recently I worked on a short clip that is simply LOL and even ROFL in all its glory. I still can't stop laughing about it!!!

You the best la, M.

:D :D :D

2007-05-17T09:29:00.000-07:00

Reading the papers recently has been akin to playing a secret game of see-who-you-can-spot. For now, the novelty is still there and my heart never fails to skip a little beat whenever I spot names I recognise. My highest count so far has been 4. Seeing these familiar names gives me little doses of smugness derived from a sense of "I'm watching you", but rather, more of "I know what you did THIS summer". ooooooo.

I wore a top out tonight that I've never really been very comfortable wearing. No it's not skimpy, no it's not vulgar. It just always makes me feel... self-conscious. As I walked towards the train station, the cool breeze gently brushing against me and my slippers making soft squishing sounds against the wet road, a small smile broke out across my face as a memory slowly floated back.

I had worn this T-shirt to a campus newspaper committee meeting sometime last year. My very first time to the meeting, in fact. There were many topics discussed in the meeting, and one involved the need for more sports writers, as numbers in that area had been dwindling.

After the meeting, the sports editor came up to me and asked if I wanted to write for sports. Ha ha ha! Does he think I look very sporty?!!?!?!?!!, I thought to myself as I gave him an absolutely incredulous look.

"Your T-shirt says 'I Love Football'," he said as a matter-of-fact.

Oh.

Because my daddy does, dude. Because my daddy does.

2007-05-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

I was on the phone with P tonight and I listened as she rattled on excitedly about her conversation with E the night before. P raved about how E had grown amidst unfriendly circumstances. "E ran to God when she felt down and lonely. I wouldn't have done that! I think I would have run away from God and everyone else!"

I didn't know it then, but I know it now. The only reason why I managed to press on despite of everything that happened was simply because people were praying for me. So thank you, you, and especially you for your prayers that were the invisible winds on which I rode on. The silent swirls that surrounded and protected, and that which gently encouraged me to take one more step, to live one more day.

There was absolutely no way I could have done it by my own strength. I am really, really thankful for all your prayers, and I'm just as glad I didn't give up.

So,

Thank you.

For praying.

Because I have been tremendously blessed.

2007-05-13T09:42:00.000-07:00

Been wanting to catch this film for a while ever since I knew of it some months ago. By luck, I finally managed to catch the tv premiere on the Hallmark Channel tonight. And boy was I glad I caught it.

I watched this movie just expecting to see impressive shots and artistic cinematography. But it delivered that and beyond. The storyline enabled a rich opportunity for character development, and I absolutely loved loved loooved Makoto Iwamatsu in his role. He brought out the complexities of his character in such a heart-wrenchingly real manner, every crease and fold on his face seemed to reveal yet a deeper dimension to him in the show. And of course it also helps that he is one charming old man. ;) He gets many many thumbs-ups from me!

I was pretty satisfied with the film on the whole. Loved the beautiful shots that were scattered along the way like golden coins luring you on for more (everytime I get lost in the storyline and a beautiful shot comes up I literally take in a short sharp breath), the international cast delivered tasteful acting, the storyline and music flowed nicely with the pace, aiyah basically I just liked it la. I can't think of what more to say cos I'm just not gifted in writing reviews and the above words came out resistantly like spurts of toothpaste. (hurhurhur)

My only suggestion for improvement would be to extend the ending cos it seemed a little abrupt for me. I would have been happier to see a more definitive closure. But the film left me so saturated with plenty of things to think about and that's really what matters.

For reading through my less-than-appealing review, here's the (extended) trailer.

Check out the movie here. I think it might still be showing in cinemas, so hurry if you want to watch it!

2007-05-12T09:21:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I encountered a tiny problem with the left side of my contact lenses. I was trying the bi-monthly version that was a little thicker, a little bigger, and a little more challenging than the normal dailies that I have been accustomed to.

Whenever I put on the left lens, my left eye would start to tear and blur up. But no matter how hard I blinked, the tears just could not pass out through the lens. Trapped behind, they ended up blurring my vision.

I told some people about my queer predicament and I was told that I needed to get used to the new lens.

So I tell my eyes, be patient and give me some time. Soon, the tears will be no more and you will see the world just as you always have.

2007-05-11T09:27:00.001-07:00

This is my favourite part of the train ride to school (when I'm not sleeping, that is). The beautiful green stretches on to a peaceful lake and the waters look especially magical in the mornings when the sunlight glitters over the surface. Only today when I stood on the platform at Chinese Garden was I struck by the beauty of it all. It's really not the same peering from inside the train.

In keeping up with my latest campaign to build myself up, I went swimming with J today. The company was great, the encounters were amusing, and the experience at a public swimming pool was enough to convince us to head to a private pool the next time round.

Scene 1: Lost

We got off at the wrong train station, walked a distance on, and only realised we were at the wrong place after we asked a man on a bike. So we flagged a cab to rectify the problem. (Note to M: Is this reason justified?)

Scene 2: Into the Blue (not!)

When we were buying our entry tickets, we read a notice on the machine which stated that the wave pool was under maintainance, hence was not in use.

Ooooh what a dampener, we thought sadly.

Scene 3: Army Daze (the prelude)

When J and I entered the lap pool, it was relatively empty, save for a group of young boys. J and I swam a lap to the other end of the pool, and the group of boys made no attempt at discretion by following us as we swam.

Ignore them, we decided, so we started on another lap and swam past them. The boys ducked their heads underwater as we passed. J heard their comments, and till now it still disgusts the living daylights out of me. I feel immensely violated. Urgh. These boys should really have been at last Sat's message on Lust.

Scene 4: Initial D

Since I don't drive, I never quite understood road rage. This is further compounded by a very good-natured father who has never lost his temper behind the wheel. But today, I think I somewhat got it when a young boy flamboyantly splashed across my lane, halting me in the middle of my swim.

You-don't-respect-me-that's-why-you-cut-my-lane-is-it??!!?!!?!??!?!

So tell me, did I get it right about road rage?

Scene 5: The Ghost Whisperer

In the shower, I took the left cubicle, J took the middle one, and a few young girls shared the right one. In the midst of showering, one of the young girls commented to another one: The water like got no strength ah?

Thinking it was J, I replied, YA LOR!!!!

Then I heard a hesitant young voice:...who said that?!?!?! The lights started flickering not long after, and the poor (terrified) little girls cried out, mummy!!! I'm scared!!!

(What a laugh!)

Scene 6: Eyes Wide Shut

While eating dinner at KFC (ok I know this totally defeated the point of exercising), J and I sat at a table on the second level of the Jurong East Sports Complex that overlooked the wave pool. And, lo and behold, the waves just started rolling.

Isn't the wave pool closed for maintenance?! We walked to the ticket machine on our way out to take another look at the notice we saw earlier, only to realise a slip of blank paper had been pasted over.

Tough luck.

Scene 7: A Series of Unfortunate Events

Unable to believe how we were tricked into believing the wave pool was not functioning, we burst out in peals of laughter punctuated with girlish giggles as we walked out.

A middle-aged man walked past us and said cheekily in chinese, What can be so funny till you're laughing like this?

Er... we wasted no time in getting out of the place.

2007-05-10T10:08:00.000-07:00

I fell in love with Rybczynski's film the first time I saw it in New Media Art class. Imagine, to me, was more than just the mutability of an image that has revolutionised the art scene. No, it went deeper than that.

I saw the growing up of an innocent young girl with a clean and unwounded heart. Gradually exposed to the ways of the world, she transformed from a child riding her charming white rocking horse to a woman incomplete and lost in the vices around her.

I have loved this piece of art ever since. It made its point so subtly, but yet it touched me in such a beautifully poignant way.

I went running today.

(Yes you, who were probably frolicking in the crystal-clear waters of krabi, I finally went running today.)

It was a nostalgic experience, to say the least. I dug out my JC sports wear and put on socks that I haven't worn since I-don't-know-when. I found the sports watch that I used to wear to school, and realised it had been on timer mode since I last left it. Which was, probably, years ago.

It was an uneasy feeling when I realised that this watch had been timing my whole life quietly for the past year or so. It was as if I had been secretly documented all this time as I went about my tiny room combing my hair, flipping my notes, or clearing my clothes.

I feel like this watch now knows all my deepest darkest secrets, all that has been going on in the quiet of my room. And I am almost obliged to bribe it not to spill everything out. It's like it totally did what it was meant to do. It watched.

I ran because I wanted to train perseverance and strength. I wanted the feeling of being able to take on a whole new day, I wanted the rush of endorphins in me. So I ran.

I ran past the postman doing his daily rounds, I ran past a lovely house I never noticed before, I ran past old colonial shop-houses that, against the azure blue sky, looked like an image out of a postcard, I ran past a field that reminded me of the cornfield that Suzie Salmon was murdered in in The Lovely Bones, I ran past a caucasion couple cuddled next to each other outside their house just watching the cars drive past, I ran, I ran, I ran.

But I couldn't run for long. There was no one beside to motivate me when I got tired, no one to cheer me on when my muscles started to protest, no one to assure me when my lungs felt overworked. I just couldn't do it on my own.

So I made a turn for home. I reached home, turned on the fan, and fell onto the sofa. I lay there until I could no longer hear my heart pounding in my ears, until every bead of sweat evaporated, until life was back to normal.

I didn't feel any more alive than before I went for the run. I didn't feel like I had more energy to say 'bring it on'. No, I didn't. Instead, I was stricken with a throbbing headache and a sick feeling that made me want to puke.

And the morale of the story: Doing the right thing at the wrong time is still, not quite right. I really shouldn't have gone running in the sweltering heat at 3pm in the afternoon.

Word of the day (dictionary.com)

denouement \day-noo-MAWN\, noun:

1. The final resolution of the main complication of a literary or dramatic work.

2. The outcome of a complex sequence of events.

Verse of the day (biblegateway.com)

"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over."- Matthew 18:15

Lifegroup discussion of the day

Community is a choice.

2007-05-09T10:09:00.000-07:00

I wonder how long this wall behind the lanterns has stood. How many rains it has weathered, how many episodes it has witnessed. I wonder if each streak of dirt on the wall carries a different story behind, and I wonder how many more festivals it is going to commemorate.

I used to love wearing halter-dresses as a little girl. Bare-back, I would call them. My auntie, blessed with an ability that could easily command her army of needles, cloths and threads, would sew me these precious pieces of clothing. I remember I had a white one with colourful floral prints. That made me very happy.

As a little girl I had my perfect house all planned out after reading and falling in love with Alice in Wonderland. I decided that when I grew up, every door in my house would be a different shape. One would be heart-shaped (I suspect that was my decided bedroom), one would be circle-shaped, and perhaps another would be star-shaped. I recall my little heart fluttering in excitement as I closed my eyes and envisioned opening the heart-shaped door and crossing over with my tiny legs.

I was certain I would love the idea for life, even after I grew up. Not quite, I guess. Growing up is about the most elusive thing one can ever encounter.

I used to burst into town after my exams and embrace the endless possibilities of movies, shopping, and food. 2 weeks ago found me at Borders after my last paper, eyebrows furrowed and head bowed as I lost myself in a compilation of extraordinary stories from a magazine.

Not far from me, a middle-aged man made his unhappiness known very audibly.

"I can't believe Borders doesn't have books on similes and metaphors. I am very insulted.

This book store should be called don't-border."

This is the kind of wit that sends a rush of tingling excitement through me and leaves me tickled with amusement for a very, long, time.

2007-05-08T09:57:00.000-07:00

Of frazzled nerves and reckless swerves.

I used to be able to be pretty much in control of myself. I ward off distractions and focus fairly easily. It's a blessing that I am truly grateful for. But lately I seem to have been robbed of that ability, and I don't like it one bit.

This afternoon at home I caught myself just in time when I realised that I had put a potentially explosive porcelein bowl into the microwave and set the timer ticking. Thank God, oh thank God. I stopped the timer immediately and stood there for a while. I've never put this bowl into the microwave before. What was I thinking?

Then I reached out and opened the cupboard on the right for the sugar, but saw the soy sauce instead. Oh right, the sugar's in the left cupboard. What was I thinking? Lots, apparently.

Recently I just qualified myself as a bona fide member of the youtube generation by signing up for an account and uploading some videos of my own. After the registration process, I was directed to my account page.

You have nothing in your video log. (ok that's fine with me)

You have no favourites. (doesn't bother me)

You have no subscribers. (no prob, I still think my videos rock.)

You have no friends.(......oh.)

No kidding, I literally paused for a few moments as those 4 words kept replaying in my mind. Does youtube have to be THAT harsh? Technically the most attractive step to take next would be fleeing to friendster and clicking furiously on "You have 278 friends."

But hey, I'm not THAT insecure.

Last night I lounged in front of the TV taking in programme after programme of frivolous entertainment. But amidst all of that, a line from After Hours caught my attention.

You have ignored a woman's emotions, and that, in her dictionary, is a capital offense.

Tomorrow sees a group of three happily flying to the beautiful island of Krabi. Have fun please. :) You'll be in my prayers, and you'll be sorely missed. Awaiting your return. LYDDDD!

2007-05-05T11:16:00.000-07:00

I love this picture. Was having fun one afternoon with the newly-discovered macro function (yes I'm such a terrible laggard), when I caught the dripping tea in mid-air. How often do you get to appreciate such small beauties of life in this manner? I say, amen to photography for allowing us to capture the sweet little moments that we often forget.

God is amazing. The topic during lifegroup today couldn't be more timely for this season. It's during times like these that you just know in your spirit, God already has everything neatly planned out.

Today I concluded. Probably the best advice that I've ever heard in my whole life has got to come from Proverbs 4:23.

Above all else, guard your heart,

for it is the wellspring of life.

Today the 3 girls from the East (east side rocks!) sat in a Hong Kong eatery and talked about Heaven and hell till late into the night. As she was talking with her characteristic spurts of excitement and ever-twinkling eyes, I looked at her and thought to myself: this is a girl that I grew up with and have known since we were both scrawny, awkward lasses. And I love her. Doesn't matter what she does, what she chooses, or what she says. I love her, and I accept her completely as she is. This must be what love is.

2007-05-04T10:06:00.000-07:00

I am rather satisfied with today. That's because I actually had something productive to work on.

For the first time in my life I was quietly dreading the holidays to come, because that would mean I would be thrown into a sea of no direction, no purpose to wake up for, no work to lose myself in. I started getting scared at this unfamiliar stranger who didn't get excited at the prospects of shopping, watching tv, or even sleeping (even sleeping!!!). No, all I wanted to do was to lose myself in work and work and more work.

I think I might be a changed person now, and I attribute it to the last 4 months of unceasing deadlines. I never used to be much of a workoholic, but the last 4 months opened my eyes to the unexplainable joys of losing myself in task after task, burrowing my head and filling my mind up with to-do lists like no tomorrow. Yes, I think I actually quite enjoy work now. Workholic? Perhaps a newbie. Escapism? Very likely.

I never quite understood it, but now I think I do. Working against a deadline gives you an adrenaline rush that makes you feel more alive than ever. And the completion of a task done well is just about the best feeling in the world. Oh, and, it makes you forget about everything else too.

Today was perhaps the first day of the holidays I felt so alive. I woke up, made an important phone call, scurried to assemble the relevant documents, rushed for a lunch meeting at the mint museum of toys, gave them our video we did of them, rushed home, "collated my specimens" (as said by S), sent them out, wrote an email to a loved one, then rushed off for another meeting at night.

What an adrenaline rush! Loved it!

People always tell me I'm in a daze, and I've come to conclude that perhaps they might be right. E told me that whenever a group of us talk, I never fail to trail off after a while into my own world, softly humming to myself as I retreat from the conversation. I never used to notice that, but recently I've been caught red-handed many times.

There was the time before the paper we went to the toilet (yes girls go to the toilet together), carrying on the conversation as we each entered different cubicles. And suddenly E stopped and asked, "tiffy, are you humming to yourself in the cubicle??!"

And there was the other time we huddled around a bench, unwinding and talking about the exams that were to come. I trailed off slowly in my signature way, and a soft tune hummed out from my mouth. N, who was sitting beside me and who was talking, stopped. "Tiffy, have you started going off into your own world?"

"Yes she's started humming already," E piped in.

And the most recent one. We were sitting around a table outside Mac's on a hot Monday night. The girls were talking about haircuts, when SH said, "Tiffy why are you smiling to yourself? You look like you're going to start floating upwards any minute."

I'm not kidding you when I say I really take no notice of such subconscious idiosyncracies. I asked SS once. Do I really always go off into my own world? "Ya, you're in a daze like 80% of the time!"

Hm. So I've been wondering, what do I offer when I'm with other people, since I'm technically not there 80% of the time? This is such a life-defining moment.

I've been carrying the new issue of Reader's Digest around with me recently. These days, I pounce on every opportunity to read the magazine when I'm travelling. Reminds me of someone I know who reads on all his train rides. I sleep on all my trains rides, I replied him, without batting an eyelid.

SS calls my to and fro 45 min train rides "lost in translation" moments for me. Once I step into the train, I just let it do its thing for the next 45 mins, and I'm literally lost from the world during that window of time. I didn't even know Tanjong Pagar was a station along the line I ply back and forth religiously 5 (on lucky weeks, 4) days a week.

Anyway back to Reader's Digest. I read a beautiful story in the magazine today. A woman talked about her mother's hands. She wrote how lovely she thought her mother's hands were, but her mother always thought otherwise. They're ugly hands, her mother always said of her own hands.

Yet these were the mother's hands that lovingly prepared her lunchboxes, the very hands that clutched the steering wheel while on the way to school. And later, these were the mother's hands that held hers, which were abused many times from injecting drugs.

It's amazing how such a simple story had such a poignant effect. The topic of growing up never fails to put me in a pensive mood.

Today, my biggest faux pas (euphemism for bimbo moment) was at lunch.

I played around with the metal salt and pepper shakers, lifted them slightly, then exclaimed very excitedly,

Oh my gosh! They're magnetic!

My friends looked at me as though I was crazy. It's their weight la, they said. I thought for a while, and blushed. Darn, they're right. The table is a freaking piece of plastic!

2007-05-02T21:46:00.000-07:00

You know,
I really hate it how I get it one minute and the next I don't. Like how I thought I've finally pulled myself out and before I know it I'm sinking again. I am tired tired tired tired of it all.

God, enough already?

I can't already. I can't already.

I've had enough God...

ok?

I am tired of trying to be strong, I am tired of smiling when I'm hurting, I am tired of trying to figure it out, I am tired of thinking, I am tired of crying, I am tired of being alone, I am tired of being jaded, I am tired of running away, and I am just tired thinking what on earth I am tired from.

I am just tired, ok?

justletmerantfornow

thisisasrealasitgets

I had an idea last night,

and I have a darn good mind to put it into action.

I've really had enough.

2007-04-30T11:37:00.000-07:00

2007-04-30T11:07:00.000-07:00

2007-04-26T12:32:00.000-07:00

There was one day after a paper I sat in my seat waiting for the invigilators to dismiss us. I thought to myself, God, the whole experience was kinda nice. But well it's officially over now. I bid thee adieu!

While we were walking out, she suddenly exclaimed: Oh my gosh! Look at that car!

And that moment was brief - as fleeting as a summer fling.

2007-04-21T07:14:00.000-07:00

I'm coming back to the Heart of Worship,

Where it's all about you, it's all about you Jesus.

I'm sorry Lord for the things I've made it,

When it's all about you,

It's all about you, Jesus.

Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Yayday(s)!

2007-04-18T11:47:00.000-07:00

About the most exciting thing that happened today was watching a Taiwanese variety show!!! Whoop whoop whoop!!! As you can tell, my life hasn't exactly been the most exciting these days. I even jump at the opportunity of having to bathe (like, it becomes the highlight of my day) because well, it just means lesser time with 'em notes.

I succumb to the weirdest things during study periods. I actually play the piano during this time. So if you're my neighbour, and you hear me play the piano, you'll know it's exam time! Cos I'd just rather do anything than study. There is just such an unprecedented inertia towards studying this time round. Oh boy. This is very, very bad.

But in all honesty, I really love Taiwanese variety programmes! They're the only rare shows on tv that can actually make me laugh out loud cos they're just friggin' silly. They come up with the most ridiculous stunts and hey, I have to say the celebrities are pretty good sports too.

Funny funny funny!!! Ok let me divulge an embarrassing secret here. I once trooped over to a friend's hostel room to catch an episode of Super Sunday (chao ji xin qi tian! super!) during exam period in year 1. HAHAHA. :D

Oh and another secret! Today I caught a Hong Kong show after dinner, just in time to see a suave dude rescue a damsel in distress. Oh course they got together after that, and even rode away in bus number 520 (it reads 'I Love You' in Chinese). Ya ok I did smile to myself alright??!! Romance to spice up my day what!

Sigh tomorrow I might very well count the tiles on the floor!

2007-04-17T10:08:00.000-07:00

Today it dawned on me that the reason behind all the recent pent-up emotions and wild-running thoughts might just be due to the fact that I've been cooped up in my crib. So today's venture outdoors was good for the soul, even if the reason was to take an exam.

And there were lots of laughter to boot! Her mockingly-woeful whine, "xxx doesn't love me anymore, he didn't message me good-luck for the exam!" was said with such doleful eyes coupled with a melodramatic sigh, it was an unmistakable cue for a good, hearty laugh.

This is the same girl who looked me in the eye with all honesty over dinner, saying, "Haiyah, you should really get together with yyy. Cos I think he has really nice eyes and you have nice eyes too."

??!!?!?!!?

HAHAHA!!!

Ooooh I love you babe. :D

Ooh how can I forget those exam questions? Indubitably some of the funniest I've come across to date. Seriously, they should set a law banning all exam questions with the slightest sense of humour, because I just get flung off the serious mode, gagging from trying my best not to burst out in uncouth, raucous laughter.

Here're some examples from today's paper:

14. Spiders extrude their silk from

a) Nipples

I just couldn't read on further ok??!!?!! I was sooooo distracted because the image that came into my mind was just hiiiii-laaaaa-riiiioooooous. (image up to own interpretation)

33. Which of the following simplified procedures is currently used for cloning animals?

c) Take a starved donor cell and implant it into an egg whose nucleus has been removed. Cook the egg using a microwave and implant into the surrogate mother.

Er.... seriously??!?!!??!?!?!

This one totally got me man!! I had to succumb to rocking in my chair and jiggling the slipper on my right foot just so I could channel the suppressed energy elsewhere. In my mind I was bursting out in (very) audible laughter, whilst one hand was slapping my thigh and the other was banging the table. Imagine the precious time wasted just to compose myself and will my mind back to deep concentration!

Out with all funny exam questions already!

Today my God gave me the tiny assurances that I oh-so-needed. Like a journey made one step at a time, I say, do this one day at a time.

2007-04-16T09:10:00.000-07:00

I'm wishing upon the stars that on the 24th, the moon will be full, very blue, and please be in the right place?

2007-04-16T02:30:00.000-07:00

Only in recent times have I discovered the infinite amount of information that the internet offers. You know, it's like a huge sack of brightly coloured clothes on the floor, and you dive in and rummage and rummage and rummage through, only to find more and more treasures you never knew off before. Oh the sweet happiness!! (Yes I have just totally qualified myself as a bona fide female.)

So I leave you with my latest new discovery, The Pulitzer Prize winners and the corresponding articles. We were made to critique 2 articles for an assignment, and this is one assignment I'm sure glad we were made to do. Here's the article that I still, can't get over:

The Troubles at King/Drew

Deadly errors and politics betray a hospital's promise

By Tracy Weber, Charles Ornstein and Mitchell Landsberg

Los Angeles Times Staff Writers

On a warm July afternoon, an impish second-grader named Dunia Tasejo was running home after buying ice cream on her South Los Angeles street when a car sideswiped her. Knocked to the pavement, she screamed for help, blood pouring from her mouth.

Her father bolted from the house to her side. An ambulance rushed her to the nearest hospital: Martin Luther King Jr./Drew Medical Center.

For Elias and Sulma Tasejo, there was no greater terror than seeing their 9-year-old daughter strapped to a gurney that day in 2000. But once they arrived at King/Drew, fear gave way to relief.

Dunia's injuries were minor: some scrapes, some bruises and two broken baby teeth. The teeth would have to be pulled.

"They told me to relax," Sulma recalled. "Everything was fine."

At least, it should have been.

What the Tasejos didn't know was that King/Drew, a 233-bed public hospital in Willowbrook, just south of Watts, had a long history of harming, or even killing, those it was meant to serve.

Over the last year, reports by journalists and regulators have offered stark glimpses of failings at King/Drew: Nurses neglecting patients as they lay dying. Staff failing to give patients crucial drugs or giving them toxic ones by mistake. Guards using Taser stun guns on psychiatric patients, despite an earlier warning to stop...

For the rest of the article, click here. Then click on the year 2005, click on "public service", and finally click on the tab "works".

2007-04-15T11:42:00.000-07:00

I love how beautiful these chromosomes look. Like 46 yummy popsicles, almost. Is it just me, or do these squiggly chromosomes hidden deep inside you and me almost seem obscene to look at?

Aren't the antibodies in us just amazing? Such a simple-looking structure, but they're not to be messed with!

This sent chills down my spine. White blood cell engulfing a yeast cell - caught right in the motion. You mean this goes on inside of me all the time?

Thought the Matrix was mind-blowing? Check out the biology behind it. I was floored, man.

2007-04-14T11:41:00.000-07:00

Yes I'm on a blogging roll indeed!

Studying for Science or Fiction? Biology in Popular Media has made me feel like I'm back in the days of seconday school mugging for a good'ol Bio paper. Nothing much has changed actually. Same room, same chair, same table, same content (much less), same time of the night, same quiet all around.

Friendster never fails to spring random surprises on me every now and then. I'm talking about the invites I receive. Today I checked my account and I found a secondary school friend asking me to be her friend (hurhur). Gosh, I've never really been on good terms with this person. I was a prefect, she was a blatant rule-breaker, so I always booked her. Hey at least I'm honest!

I don't really have any good memories of her. The people I used to book, out of duty, didn't really end up liking me very much. She was in my class in sec 1 and 2, and the only memory I have of her is her falling asleep on the table in the science lab, then awakening full of energy and enthusiasm, asking questions and taking down notes.

Yea, I do remember the weirdest things.

I capture random images in my head and store them for a considerable amout of time. So the next time you're with me, smile, cos you never know when you're on candid camera!

Talking about Friendster,

It's funny how I've gone from Friendster to the Newspapers.

"The medium is the message." - Marshall McLuhan

2007-04-13T21:40:00.000-07:00

I've been recently hooked onto dictionary.com.

(Yes because I read the dictionary everyday.)

(OH PLEASE!!!)

So here's a little fun-loving trivia for today:

Word of the day

spoonerism \SPOO-nuh-riz-uhm\, noun:

The transposition of usually initial sounds in a pair of words.

Examples:

- We all know what it is to have a half-warmed fish ["half-formed wish"] inside us.

- The Lord is a shoving leopard ["loving shepherd"].

- It is kisstomary to cuss ["customary to kiss"] the bride.

- Is the bean dizzy ["dean busy"]?

- When the boys come back from France, we'll have the hags flung out ["flags hung out"]!

- Let me sew you to your sheet ["show you to your seat"].

Spoonerism comes from the name of the Rev. William Archibald Spooner (1844-1930), a kindly but nervous Anglican clergyman and educationalist. All the above examples were committed by (or attributed to) him.

Have a wreat geekend ["great weekend"]!

2007-04-13T09:01:00.000-07:00

Help ma,

I'm EMO!

Argh I really hate it when I'm put on a guilt trip. Now I really feel like burying my head in a towel and running off to a room where I will hide behind locked doors, and oh-so-mournfully reflect on my wrongdoings.

Bleah.

He, whom I've been so full of angst towards, the one who I indirectly blasted in my previous post (read: unpleasant phone call), is the culprit behind my overwhelming emo-ness now.

Today, during our last lesson, he sprang many surprises which made my heart sink further and further in shame. First it was the nicely wrapped voting boxes which he prepared, then he took out prize after prize from a duffel bag almost like a bottomless pit, following we exited from the class with a buffet spread already prepared, next he unveiled a huge cake which said "Congratulations".

Oh that's only scrapping the surface. He gave us 2 bottles of Champagne (100% real!), and super expensive chocolate made of 99% Cocoa, so high-end the chocolates came with a catalogue in the box.

OOOHHHH MMMAAAAAANNNNNN I feel like the most ungrateful person on earth. How could I how could I how could I.

He sprang this mini vote-for-the-best video stunt towards the end, and my group won the honourable 2nd prize. That won us a box of chocolate-coated coffee beans with a catalgue written in French. The group that won the best video got awarded a cup each, specially printed with the word "WINNER", and his infamous website logo.

WHOA I'm on a major guilt trip here. Why are all the lecturers this sem suddenly pulling this emotional stunt on me?!

So there I was loitering around the buffet spread, head hung in shame, going to people to tug on their shirts and saying, oh man help me I'm so emo. He's so nice I can't stand it!!! And they gave me the oh-ya-he's-nice-but-just-eat-your-food-already response. Boohoo. So I went around looking for more people to release my emo-ness to. HAHA.

I can't help it that I realllllllyyyyyy appreciate things like that ok?! Appreciate with all my heart, deep deep inside out!!! I'm just a person built in a way who gets really happy/contented/excited at the small little things in life, and this is no way small!! This totally blew me away!!

Some asked me: So easily bribed ah?!

Ya la I admit I get won over very fast. (I mean, just note the difference in tone between the two posts man!!!) And I've been warned to guard my heart cos just a simple gesture can send me melting like no tomorrow.

But still I really appreciate what he's done for us! He didn't have to do it at all, but he chose to.
All is well all is well. I forgive him for everything!

2007-04-12T22:09:00.000-07:00

woowoo!

I've typing in beautiful weather after a 15 hour sleep. Hello I was totally repaying my sleep debt from 13 weeks ok?! For one hour a week, that's not even enough la! (Darn should have slept longer)

And so I have been in a jolly good mood since last night because yesterday I finally handed in the last of all my assignments. Woo! A full 13 weeks of: 7 videos (GOSH DID I REALLY DO THAT?!) and 9 written assignments, 1 focus group and 1 survey (the construction of, not the doing). Oh man those figures totally do injustice to the amount of work they hide behind their innocent exteriors. Pfft.

Yesterday we happily had dinner and even dessert (yummy choc sundae and fries!), macham like the semester's over already. Ok ok I know my first paper is in 4 days and ok I know I know I haven't started studying! But oh man throw that to the wind for a while cos this feeling is just unbeliveable: I've finished all my assignments for this sem! Whoa this is so surreal, can??!!??!

(I promise I'll get down to studying real soon! Ok la no choice actually)

But before that someone deserves a worthy mention. Someone I see every Thursday, someone who has definitely definitely won me over with his passion. He is a living inspiration man.

The lecturer, of course. (ss! who were you thinking of?!) Gosh I'm actually sad that his module has ended. He has imparted his love of journalism to us, and his sincere desire to change the world is so apparent every time he speaks.

"I hope you will continue reading what you have liked," he said in his ending speech. Ohhhhhhhh maaaaannnnnn he's like the smiling old grandpapa that buys ice cream for every kid on the street. (Oh yes did I mention he bought all of us mcdonald's just because he had a make-up lecturer that lasted into the night?)

Sigh. Actually at the beginning of this semester I was on the verge of dropping this module because well, I wasn't interested in journalism. But thanks to him, thanks to mdm tough-love, and thanks to my two other heroes who probably don't even know my name, I think I have found a new interest in life.

I'm so curious how that younger version of the lecturer will turn out. This gives me incentive to read the papers religiously eh. ;)

I can't wait for the exams to end so I can get on with my life. The world is an oyster, y'all!

This sem, I've achieved so much more outside the curriculum.

I wouldn't choose it another way, really.
:)

2007-04-10T11:00:00.000-07:00

Today was a rather dramatic day, to say the least.

So dramatic, I'd rather be writing it down than be sleeping at this untimely hour of 2 am (when I have to wake up at 7, when I haven't studied for exams which start next week, when all my secrets come spilling out).

I woke up in the afternoon today quite happily satisfied with my adequate sleep, busied around tying up loose ends of an assignment, grabbed my clothes, and headed to the bathroom.

But alas (I'm trying to sound dramatic here), I received an innocent sounding phone call that turned out not to be so innocent after all.

To cut the long story short, and to save you, and me, from the complicated nature of the issue, the phone call was far from pleasant.

Basically, I was shot with many rhetorical questions (so irritating), which I could only answer (the irony) with a "I'm sorry? I can't hear you." (of course that was only partly true)

Example:

"I haven't seen your stories. Who approved your stories? Me? Or your editor?"

"I'm sorry? I can't hear you."

(Obviously no one approved our stories. But that's another story for another time.)

And I was given 2 choices: Either re-edit your 2 stories by 5pm today, or they would be ungraded.

Ok, I said. (what else could I say?)

The call ended, I looked at the clock, it was 3.30. So I have to take a cab down to school, I thought. Even then, I would only have 45 minutes to edit a mountain out of 2 stories. Or they won't be graded.

I called my groupmate, broke the bad news (in quite an angry and irritated state I'm sorry), and rushed off on my mission to get to school in the fastest time possible.

I couldn't remember where I put my clothes when the call came.

I couldn't think straight for a while, actually. It takes some time reeling from being on the receiving end of someone who sounded quite angry over the phone. Someone who holds my grade in his hands. Or they won't be graded.

'Twas really not quite the best news to hear just a week before the exams, y'noe.

But I very miraculously waltzed into a cab the minute I hit the road and was very miraculously whisked away by a speeding cabbie (only good for a time like this).

I reached school, very miraculously composed myself to humbleness, and asked what he wanted to be changed.

Oh very simple, just minor edits. Thanks for coming all the way down, he said.

ooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.

We were done in like 10 minutes thank you very much.

And even so, they chose the wrong, unedited version for the screening in the end.

Oh it's alright, it was too late for them to change to your edited one, he said.

oooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.

Today was a rather dramatic day, to say the least.

And I don't believe exams are next week already. Like, seriously? Cos I still haven't finished your assignment dude!

2007-04-08T10:43:00.000-07:00

You know I can't multi-task right?

(Tell you a secret: It gets worse when I'm tired.)

Here I am willing myself to stay awake and continue trudging on the 15-page assignment (hm I wonder if it's double spaced). It's 1.45 am and I just had myself a bowl of milo (enery boosting!) cereal. I picked up my phone and realised my sticky hands had made my phone er, sticky, too.

So off I trotted to the bathroom, wet a piece of tissue, and gently swiped my phone all over. And I nearly threw my phone into the toilet bowl.

Like, seriously.

Cos one hand was holding the tissue paper and the other the handphone and I can't multi-task even more so when I'm tired so when I wanted to throw the tissue into the toilet bowl I almost ended up throwing the phone in thank goodness I didn't or I will just throw my 15-page assignment in also oh man I want to sleep la.

(I don't talk sense when I'm tired.)

(some people call describe it as "It's 2am. All her secrets will come out! Quick ask now!)

2007-04-02T09:17:00.000-07:00

And because we've been condemned to living like hermits for a while,

some brought the Singapore Fashion Festival right into the heart of school.

With her wearing a chic dress (ya right your jeans were in the wash),

her donning a waisted belt (ya right you just took it from your mum),

and her wearing artfully applied makeup (ya right school is so sian you need to spice it up).

See la, all you people and all your excuses!

;)

And what about me?

I sported a bright pink t-shirt to school,

only to bump into someone else wearing the: exact. same. thing.

I never thought this day would happen to me in school ok!

BUT.

I was pretty darn amused.

:D

It was just so refreshing to be in an environment fuelled by genuine passion and perhaps sincere altruism. What better way to end off our 7th video than spending an afternoon losing ourselves in the engaging stories we never knew. We were very very blessed indeed, and such things, we shouldn't take for granted.

It was a good afternoon.

A very enriching and inspiring one.

Who knew toys had so much to tell?

mint museum of toys

Behind the rows of figurines and beneath the polished exteriors,

they are onto something big here.

They are what I call, living a dream.

2007-04-01T10:05:00.000-07:00

for going through all that trouble to score some impressive brownie points,

two little girls learnt this week that you can't have your cake, and eat it as well.

sold out, girls.

some of the best compliments and validation have come admist trudging through some pretty hard times.

some call it fate, some call it love

some call it guidance from above

- Katie Melua

"Just that you've gotta learn some things first, so God is delaying the light at the end of the tunnel. It's a dark, lonely train ride, but remember that you ARE heading somewhere, so envision the destination where you want to be, and be strong on the journey meanwhile.

...And know that once you've reached, I'll be there when the train doors open."

happy first, babe.

so our ardous train rides have come in pretty useful. ;)

i'm still "immersing in happiness".

this one will last quite a while to keep me going.

a heartfelt sincere yay.

this small victory is worth celebrating,

no?

in my life, be lifted high

in my world, be lifted high

in my love, be lifted high

and i pray for strength.

2007-03-27T09:51:00.000-07:00

the last 3 months have just been really really draining. exams are looming and i'm full of angst because it seems like i still have to climb a string of mountains and complete a heap of assignments before i can even stop to think about the exams.

i've been working hard on keeping up with the speed of the treadmill. but everyone needs a break sometimes.

let me rest already?

2007-03-24T11:01:00.000-07:00

Right now,

I just want to jet to the Piazza at Cambridge for Bins and Benches.

Bins and Benches

Visitors to the Junction arrive at the Piazza, the new public square for Cambridge at the centre of the Cambridge Leisure development. At first it seems like any other normal public square. Six or seven park benches are installed at various locations in the space, and close by, the same number of bins are positioned to collect rubbish.

But this street furniture is very different. Greyworld has injected each bench and bin with a magic serum of life - each element is able to roam free in the Piazza area. The benches and bins move and flock, drifting across the space, frolicking amongst the other species that inhabit their world, exploring their Piazza.

The benches love to be sat on - it makes them particularly happy in fact, and they often take up position in new spaces to make themselves more attractive to potential human sitters. Sometimes, when it rains, they move themselves to drier, shadier areas of the square. To attract potential human sitting folk, they like to form patterns - the benches moving in to shapes in the centre of the piazza.

The bins are also free to roam the piazza, but they are a little more solitary, preferring their own company, and a little quiet space to occupy. It's a tough life being a bin, and they like to contemplate their humble lot on their own.

There's one other thing to note about this free spirited furniture. When the mood takes them, perhaps when the weather is fine, or most of the bench clan are being sat on, they like to burst in to song. Sometimes, small clusters gather together and sing a tight six-part harmony, and occasionally, though much more rarely due to their shyness, the bins join in with their sweet soprano voices.

Each bench drifts slowly around the square, no faster than a strolling human, and is equipped with sensors that detect the presence of objects in its immediate vicinity, coming to a complete halt when any object is closer than two metres.

2007-03-23T10:45:00.000-07:00

I am rather happy with cultivating my new habit.

It tells me people in China are now burning fake Viagra pills to the deceased, and designed bento box lunches are all the rage in Japan. How a woman develops a special relationship with a guy literally a cut above the rest, and just yesterday, Ong Sor Fern offered her definition of a good script: a story versatile enough to be enjoyed universally across all cultures.

It is a form of self-gratification, a silent smug that you get more knowledgeable by the day. Hey, everyone needs a form of reassurance, no?

The one story that has impressed me the most thus far is the exclusive interview with the un-named Singaporean man who, as you read, is spending his time in a Sydney prison.

'I fed my daughter 200 sleeping pills', was the headline splashed across the frontpage of Home. Till now I remain impressed at how the paper managed to secure this interview, and how the guy even agreed to be interviewed.

It was a sensational story with a chilling read. The part that grabbed me the most was near the end, where we learn the man now talks on the phone to his 2 daughters once every week.

The 2 girls who are now safe cannot remember what happened that fateful night. But what if they ask you about it, the newspaper asked.

Then I'll tell them I tried to kill them, and I'm very very sorry, he was reported saying.

I don't quite know what to make out of that. Nonetheless, this is one story that will definitely stay with me for a long while.

There is a famous saying which goes: Journalists should not work to comfort the afflicted, but to afflict the comforted. I have flipped to a chapter where I remain intrigued by the world of Journalism. All because a mind-blowing presentation led to an unearthing of 2 people just being themselves. Now that, is the best part.

Anyhow, I love Bernard Cohen's quote: The media might not be successful in telling us what to think, but it sure is successful in telling us what to think about.

Food for thought there.

2007-03-22T23:05:00.000-07:00

For we are not born into mediocrity.

My eyes have been opened a little more, and I have new found respect for journalists and photojournalists alike. But more importantly, those who are fuelled by a genuine passion to tell the story and change the world.

If a B- warrants a "marked improvement", then I don't think I was born to be a journalist. And I don't have the passion (and the courage) to be the next Dan Eldon. But I still do want to change the world in my own way.

It's funny how one thing leads to another and I've landed here, typing after a night of revelation and inspiration. Almost a wake-up jolt, I say. What am I doing with my life and why? Dan Eldon's scrapbook is beautiful, but his thoughts are all the more captivating. They surround you tightly like a wist of smoke and choke the urgency out of your ticking system.

Someone said that we pay $30,000 not for our education - but to find our interest. A bumping exercise to find your path, he said. And here I must say that my (or rather my dad's) $30,000 has given me more than just school. It has been worth it, and I'm only halfway through.

A white man whose comments allowed me to "immerse in happiness" for a while revealed that his heart truly lies in Incredible India. A place where he feels most energised, even emboldened with the courage to liberalise against the law, he said.

I had my own little moment of liberation this week, and it was nothing world-changing. Merely a little anecdote I can proudly announce to my grandchildren in a few decades while sitting on a rocking-chair near the fireplace. But then again, it's not even something great.

In a bid to prove courage, I've been shot back by mind-provoking dilemmas. He told us in lecture about a comment in the US newspapers, the day after September 11, that prompted a huge uproar: Americans are the timid ones, because while they use missiles to attack other countries, these terrorists flew themselves right into the buildings.

I believe that much of the discourse of the world is subjective. Like a buffet, almost. The food all laid out under the light for scrutiny, you make the choice what you want to take away from it.

If the world works by credentials, then we are our own resumes. And our thoughts and passion become the alphabets that make up the evidence on the paper.

The world is up for grabs. The ball is, and always has been, in our courts.

This whole episode has left my heart skipping beats, my mouth speaking jumbled words in distraction, and my mind wandered in fantasy.

But this is the part where I learn why it happened and what I can do with it.

2007-03-19T08:31:00.000-07:00

I want to let you know

you're in my prayers...

I imagine you may be overwhelmed

because you've been

dealing with so much lately,

and maybe you're wondering

(as i've wondered at times in my life)

how things are ever going to work out.

And i just wanted to remind you

that although life brings many changes,

God's love for us remains constant.

He's always there, guiding us through decisions

and helping us do the hard things...

always restoring in us a sense of hope and peace,

no matter what we're facing.

And the most beautiful thing about God

is that the more we need Him,

the closer He is...

That's how i know He is especially

close to you now.

- Tara Jaye Morrow

the right words at the right time make the most sense.

thanks babe,

WGMY,HMHBTAM.

:)

today i added one more to the list.

i'm materially drained.

this is the only part where happiness can be bought!!

today i wrote the most i ever wrote in a feedback form.

angsty, i tell ya.

(i was never so enthusiastic about feedback forms)

angsty, i tell ya.

sheesh i should have stapled a piece of paper behind and written somemore.

ANGSTY I TELL YA!!!!!!!

oh. and today, i made a grown man blush.

talk about accomplishment. :D

2007-03-15T23:44:00.000-07:00

this is so cute i can't resist!

credits to rachel khoo khoo khoo for the pics and collage!

hey ss, still wanna rent a kid for 7 years only? ;)

2007-03-15T23:18:00.000-07:00

everyone needs a little lovin' sometimes.

so here's a hug for you to trudge through till your lit essay is done.

and here's a smile to tell you there's a reason for not getting it.

hey, feast on strudel and forget about your bad bad day yesterday.

oh i hope the zoo perked you up.

:)

dear me,
don't forget a pat on the back for me too.

2007-03-11T10:41:00.000-07:00

1.41 am on a sunday night,

and my week has just officially ended.

survey questions done, compiled, and sent,

report researched and completed,

video planned, filmed, and edited,

words do not justify what a week it has been.

admist skipping meals and missing sleep,

taking cabs to school and sleeping pass my train stop home,

it's amazing how i managed to throw in

a doc service, friday supper, saturday service, a concert and a date to boot.

life is still beautiful.

and one thing i took away from tonight,

is to just

smile.

2007-03-09T10:48:00.000-08:00

this week some absolutely funny things happened.

1. her "UPLOAD ALREADY" in font size 100, our hysterical laugher, and mdm tough-love's "i really don't know what's wrong with these 2 girls you know". oh, our weird adventures with teachers. ;)

2. my accidental debut porn video. very, very, VERY embarrassing. but whatever. it was freaking funny. :D :D :D

2007-03-08T08:41:00.000-08:00

this week has been such a bluuuuur.

today, i had an illuminating conversation with 2 friends A and B:

A was logging onto Friendster to show us someone.

Me: Hey, do you have me on your Friendster list?

A: You have Friendster?!

B: You have Friendster??!

Me: ...er... do i look that un-urban...?

B: Hey you haven't given me your blog add.

A: You have a blog???!

Me: !!! do i really look THAT un-urban??!

for we are pilgrims on the road, we're travellers on the way

2007-03-06T09:57:00.000-08:00

BREAKING NEWS:

663 is the new 442 is the new 221.

go figure!

"663 is only 3 numbers away from 666."

"The mmlab is like a time capsule. you go in and come out 20 years older - with wrinkles and all."

2007-02-26T08:10:00.000-08:00

hands up those of you who thought for a moment that was me and my beau.

hurhurhur.

here nat, my wedding present to you.

:D

2007-02-25T23:14:00.000-08:00

.bliss.

is when you return after a hard day at school and find Swedish meatballs in the fridge (yes with the customary sauce too) to make up for your long overdue dinner. only because the parents bought it home cos they knew we'd like them.

(who needs to stay in hall at times like this?!)

.surprise.

is when you come home at 11pm on a saturday night and you're the earliest. so the parents and the sister are out partying tonight, you think to yourself.

.curiosity.

is when at 12 midnight even your sister has come home but not yet the parents. and these are parents who sleep latest at 12.30 on saturday nights.

.thoughts running wild.

is when you stay online only because your parents are uncontactable and nowhere to be found, and all you can do is watch the digits run on the clock till 3am.

.selfish relief.

is when your parents finally come home and said grandma had fallen and was admitted to the hospital. i'm glad both of you are ok.

.switch of roles.

is when you start scolding your parents for not calling when they stayed out late and for making the children worry unduly.

.stumped.

is when your mum replies so you know how we feel.

call it humour call it chance,

but when there was drama in this house, there was drama outside the other.

when there were tears in this room, there was a broken heart in another.

there's a strange unsettling feeling when you unintentionally hear daddy fearfully shouting in his sleep because of a bad nightmare.

you find yourself unconsciously reduced to a little girl in her torn frock, peeping from behind the wall not daring to make a sound.

daddy, someone made your little girl cry. can you come give me a hug?

2007-02-18T05:45:00.000-08:00

year in year out we see the same people at the same house. the adults talk, the children play, and the youngsters just watch tv and never talk to one another. today my sister started talking to some other youngsters sitting on the same sofa as us, and i asked perhaps the most constructive question ever:

so, are we cousins?

and after so many years, i finally found out that they are my father's father's brother's daughter's children. in other words, my grand-uncle's daughter's children. in other words, my father and their mother are cousins. in other words, yeah, we are cousins.

when it was time to leave, it was only right we ended our conversation with a "see you next year".

perhaps the most traditional indicator of growing up is non other than the yearly spurts of chinese new year visiting. you realise you are no longer playing outside on the swing. you are sincerely amazed at how much a kiddo has grown since you last saw her a year ago, and you silently imagine yourself telling her, "i watched you grow up". you can't believe that the conversations you have with people your age now revolve around which places to club and the direction the economy is heading. you wonder if it's a sign relatives start asking whether you're working now.

all those, amidst austin powers showing in the background, uncles talking about the building industry at the steps, young adults discussing their children's primary one experiences near the door, peals of laughter floating in from the swing outside, and youngsters slouched on the couch watching austin powers showing in the background.

(but of course we broke that today)

2007-02-16T08:46:00.000-08:00

what a whirlwind of a week this was.

now doesn't that totally explain everything.

;)

and i think my mum's trying to be funny by buying me new year pajamas with a huge word

PROJECT

plastered across. hurhur.

so to end off,

this week the nail hit right on the head twice.

2007-02-13T09:14:00.000-08:00

if life's made up of experiences,

i think i've lived so far.

4 days, and i've done 5 interviews, completed 2 assignments, filmed twice, edited once, planned and turned up for a 21st, conducted a focus group, and it's only tuesday.

on monday in lecture we watched an old press release during the initial SARS period. the topic came around to how nurses were ostracised from public transport, and i thought of my mum. how she went to work everyday fighting the battle, how she had that worried look on her face while suggesting the whole family leave her at home and go stay with my grandma for the time being, how she lost her temper and busied around flusteredly when i came home with a fever the first day after all schools reopened.

today while we were editing, an fyp student was working on her video in the terminal infront, and i was just drawn in, just drawn in. it showed how a daughter brought her foreign boyfriend home to see her father, who had a hard time accepting the fact that his little girl had grown up. the father's flashbacks to her childhood and the painful look in his eyes made me pensive, made me pensive.

i am really, really, missing my magnets.

2007-01-31T09:18:00.000-08:00

i don't know what season it's been recently, but it seems that the people around me have been

experiencing a little more heartbreaks, shedding a little more tears, festering a little more anger, erring in a little more haste and working on a little more pain.

hang in there everyone.

did the captain of the Titanic cry?

someday we will know.

2007-01-24T08:10:00.000-08:00

i was in school for 13 hours today.

(disregarding the travelling time)

today was spent going for lectures, doing assignments, reading notes, checking out a future elsewhere and having a meeting. somewhere along the line throw in breakfast, lunch and dinner and i literally lived my whole day in school. we all cease to exist sometimes yea?

en route the last lecture of the day today i stood alone waiting for the lift. there was a vending machine near me, and suddenly a can of coffee simply dropped down. i'd like to think it dropped from heaven. how great is our God?

(of course i took it!!!)

my God has just been amazingly faithful this week. amazingly faithful. i couldn't say more.

as if i don't already have a thing against dogs, today's video in lecture showed an episode of csi where a jogger gets pounced upon by a dog - and dies.

it's not helping.

the best line i've heard this week: THIS IS TERRIFIC!

thanks, God.

2007-01-19T11:03:00.000-08:00

"every sem has new challenges"

this sem, it's our turn to be kept on our toes typing away furiously. seriously, we wouldn't care if the ceiling collapses or the ground gives away. all that matters is that we get our freaking leads out in time! talk about adrenaline rush man. hurhur. :D

*

i had really good conversations this week. the kind that you walk away filling full, with that warm fuzzy feeling gently resting in the body of your soul. monday night at maxwell market, thursday evening at dinner, and friday afternoon at lunch. i'm excited bout how God's been working in my life. :)

it's finally friday. instead of throwing my notes/books/assignments down and running out to soak in the buzz of the impending weekend, i came home. today's the first day this week i reached home while the sky was still relatively bright. first day this week i ate dinner at home. first day this week i could slump into the chair infront of the tv and just watch for a while. friday night, and i sat at my laptop and did work all the way till the day crossed over into another.

i'm kinda proud of myself. :D

baby, put the stud into studying man!!!

2007-01-13T09:26:00.000-08:00

And because A blessed B, B blessed C.

The simple ABCs of blessing.

"God does put angels on earth, and sometimes they're in us."

spot on, babe. :)

2007-01-12T10:01:00.000-08:00

thursday night saw me buzzing around my own tiny space, finally getting down to what i'd bought from ikea the week before. and so i hustled late into the night, framing a beautiful birthday poster (which now looks even more amazing when framed) and storing years of memories into 2 pretty boxes. amongst many others, a stack of paper plates and a stash of rulers in a big brown envelope sit inside nicely to be remembered.

i love it each time the realisation hits that life is like a puzzle in process. like a complete cycle of nature, so make up the different seasons of our lives. an indescribable feeling of anticipation stirs up in me each time i think of the infinite potential we all have embedded in each of us. embedded, i say. "there's something innately good about you", she said to him in the car. innate, she said.

i get giddy with excitement thinking of the possibilities we can achieve, the wonders we can live out. it's as though you have spent your whole life trying to keep both ends of a see-saw in perfect balance, and suddenly a moment comes when a strong jerk on one end forces you sitting on the other to fly off. but it no longer matters that you're not in control. no longer matters that your life is not finely balanced anymore. because now, you're flying.

we call it the big two-o.

2007-01-10T09:30:00.000-08:00

first few days of school have been hard away from my magnets, considering i spent so much beloved time with them during the holidays. on the first day of school, i slept whenever i could. i slept on the way to school, i slept when the lecturer asked us to close our eyes and think of a past image, i decided to go home to sleep while the girls happily trotted to holland v to play boardgames after class, and of course, i slept on the way home.

i usually cease to exist on the first day of school.

hurhurhur.

and while i saw the shooting star the night before school started, when the school term began, i spent so much time on STARS i was literally seeing stars. enough of those five-pointed things already!!!

last night, my sister walked into my room with an outfit on.

sis: do i look ok?

me: hmmm.... ya.... if you can pull it off.

sis: (slightly offended) what do you mean if i can pull it off?

me: you must walk with confidence and believe in yourself.

the look on my sister's face was priceless. HAHA.

seems like i always manage to say things that stun people to a speechless state. :D :D :D

today i travelled all the way to school only to attend a supposedly 3 hour lecture that was cancelled because the equipment was faulty.

wanting to justify my travelling time,

i hopped down to jurong point and had a lovely date with myself in the cinema.

and because i was alone, i felt like i had on-screen-takashi all to myself.

heeheehee. :D

2007-01-08T07:03:00.000-08:00

and we plunged. right. in.

too fast. too fast.

2007-01-07T09:37:00.000-08:00

tonight i was in sentosa, and i saw a shooting star.

then later i found out they at rp saw it too.

how cool is that?

us at 2 different locations looking at the same thing at the same time.

i like. :)

2007-01-04T11:23:00.000-08:00

2 days ago, i saw someone standing quietly in the corner, like that:

so i asked: er, are you talking to the dustbin?

he was, very shocked.

"that's the most random thing i've heard my whole life!"

ok, turns out he was cutting his nails.

currently spinning: katie melua - Piece by Piece

There are 9 million bicycles in beijing

that's a fact

it's a thing we can't deny

like the fact that i will love you till i die

we are 12 billion light years from the edge

that's a guess

no one can ever say it's true

but i know that i will always be with you

there are 6 billion people in the world

more or less

and it makes me feel quite small

and you're the one i love the most of all

- Nine Million Bicycles, Katie Melua

how beautiful is that. :)

2007-01-03T11:45:00.000-08:00

Happy 21st Evie!

there was such luuuuv in the air. :)

2007-01-02T12:04:00.000-08:00

i have 2 friends (who are themselves, good friends) whose birthdays fall on adjacent days. natalynn's birthday is on 31st dec while elaine's birthday is on 1st jan. 1 day apart, but yet a year apart. while we're on our way to turning 21 this new year, elaine just caught up with us and turned 20 at the stroke of 2007.

in jc, 3(!!) of my classmates' birthdays fall on 14th feb, valentine's day. i come to uni and i find more people with birthdays on that very same day.

i have a friend whose birthday comes once every 4 years.

i have a friend who has the same birthday as me, and she has a twin. no, her twin is not me.

i know 3 people whose birthdays fall on 10th oct.

my sister's birthday is exactly 1 month after mine.

daddy's birthday always coincides with fathers' day.

my birthday is in a movie chant.

i'm just so fascinated with things like that. :D

2006-12-30T12:00:00.000-08:00

'tis the season of strange conversations.

my sister is using the computer and i'm sitting somewhat near her on a chair, reading a camera manual.

sis: are you going out?

me : ya.

sis: then what are you doing?

me : (with a totally bewildered face) huh?

sis: why are you sitting there?

me : i'm waiting for my friend.

sis: does he drive?

me : my friend's not a guy. no she doesn't drive.

sis: then why are you all dressed up already?? what are you waiting for??

me : (very, very, bewildered) cos she's shopping!!! i'm waiting for her!!!

sis: then why don't you do something??

me : HUH! i am doing something! i'm reading the camera manuel!!!!!

don't ask me man, that whole conversation was just weird beyond words.

i'm on msn in my room, my door's closed, and it's quite late at night. i hear the main door open, so my sister must have just come home from her midnight movie.

sister's boyfriend: *nudge*

me : :D

sister's boyfriend: still awake?

me : (thinking to myself, what a silly question. duh i'm still awake right) no.

sister's boyfriend: i'm outside your room.

me : (ok... so he came back with my sis and he's using the comp outside my room.) how romantic. <3

sister's boyfriend: farney.

ok. i think it's just my sister and her boyfriend la.

2006-12-28T07:08:00.000-08:00

2006-12-22T09:43:00.000-08:00

and so i took the last bus home, thinking thinking thinking. i told someone a few days ago that i was a dreamer, only that i dream within fixed boundaries. and she told me, you're a thinker then, not a dreamer. i guess that works too.

i walked past a cat which made weird noises, and i wasn't impressed. a light drizzle came down gently, and it grew heavier, and heavier and heavier. i took out my brolly, and my feet started hurting real bad from the blisters cos of 'em shoes. it wasn't getting better, and it reminded me of that scene in Jasmine Women.

Zhang Ziyi collapsed in the middle of the night on a deserted road, under a heavy and cold downpour, desperately crying out for help as the labour pains tore her apart. She screamed and kicked and pushed, under the rain which hit and blew and howled. And in the end, she delivered the baby by her lonesone self, right on the streets of home.

ya. for a moment, it felt like that.

because i know what you did last summer, and because i'm charlie and i've got my angels to snoop around for me, i know about your upgraded gym. THE upgraded gym.

2006-12-21T08:58:00.000-08:00

picture this:

lying on a soft bed, slowly drifting away to sleep, the air-conditioner gently cooling the room, thin swirls of white musk diffusing around you, norah jones seranading in the background, and your soul sista just an arm's length away (a gentle reassurance that you are not alone).

as if your heavenly room is not enough to overwhelm me!

but thanks for the lovely afternoon.
it was just, truly, lovely. :)

2006-12-18T10:01:00.000-08:00

i want to have a friend named Jude so i can sing to him,

Hey Jude.

2006-12-18T09:19:00.000-08:00

i've been eating so much it's not funny. :S

in hong kong, the food was so good i ate and ate and ate. returning to singapore, my uncle from australia visited and off we trotted to lagoon to eat and eat and eat. then it was my cousin's birthday dinner, so at kenny roger's i chomped and chomped and chomped. ooh how can i forget my lovely date to ikea where we seriously feasted and feasted and feasted. the swedish meatballs, chicken wings, fish burger, potato salad, chocolate dessert, all by just the 2 of us. we're good la. ;)throw in the occasional snacks like nutella spread on digestive biscuits, famous amos and subway and oreo cookies, and you better get what i mean already.

but i know better than to grumble that i have too much food to eat. it's just like that skinny classmate who whines that she's fat while you in TAF club feel like slapping her, or that rich spoilt brat who complains she has not enough money to spend. yep i'm just glad i'm blessed with so much great food to eat la. really. cos just having nice food to eat makes me happy happy happy. (:

today i visited the National History Musuem with my little missy and i was floored. in every sense of the word. i don't want to give it away so all i'm gonna say is this: go go go!!! go for the truly authentic exibition of the National History Musuem - the history of Singapore. it was so wow. costs cheaper than a movie, and you sure experience a whole lot more. go la. ;)

2006-12-15T08:25:00.000-08:00

i have 2 little nieces staying in Tasmania. last year, when they were in the bathtub, they were playing with some sponge toys. A was playing with a mouse-shaped one, and T wanted it. so very cleverly, T hatched a plan.

4-year-old T (very gently): A, mouse says it wants to come over to me.

2-year-old A (without even batting an eyelid): mouse can't talk.

though i'm easily persuaded, i'm not so easily convinced. and that, i have to pay the consequences for, because i can be oh-so-stubborn. strong-willed, if you take to euphemism. ;)

2006-12-13T08:15:00.000-08:00

there's nothing more lethal than a mixture of thunder, night rain, and my good ol' magnets. throw in the well-worn pillows with blanket, and it's potent.

saying that, my sister wondered aloud to mum 2 days ago,

"mummy, nowadays there are a lot of people sleeping and not waking up ah."

yes the mixture above can be potent. at your own risk folks. there are so many freak accidents happening recently, they're really, urm, freaking me out.

i love quotable quotes. when someone puts a thought into words so explosive it hits you the moment you read it, time halts momentarily, your world stops spinning, and you just repeat that line over and over again as the realisation slowly seeps into your whole being.

when i was standing around at the airport in hong kong, a father and son pair stood beside me.

father: give your handphone to me, better don't bring it around with you.

son : but i want to bring it with me!

father: what if it gets lost?

son : what if i get lost?

and there i was beside them trying my bestest to hide a huge smug grin on my face. way to go son! thanks for scoring a point for all the children of the world!

in hong kong, i visited Burger King at The Peak. and inside, i found the cheesiest (no pun intended), albeit entertaining poster ever. i can't remember exactly, but it goes something like that.

At Burger King, you make the choice. Because on life's menu, you are today's special, the day after, and the day after. even though we are the king, you, my friend, are the grand master.

disclaimer: it did not appear exactly like that, but the overall similarity still lies.

enough cheese sir?

since we're on the topic of quotable quotes, let me end off with today's one, given by she-who-i-was-out-with. (i'm saving you the embarrassment, better thank me with your life ah!)

"...but we cannot marry for money, we must marry for love."

hahaha. sorry la, thinking bout it, together with your sincere face, still cracks me up. hahahaha. :D

2006-12-10T08:59:00.000-08:00

a year ago, this conversation took place:

"are you all set?"

"i'm all sad."

a year ago, i had to bring my laptop along cos it was my only saving grace, my only connection to beyond, the only thing to keep me sane.

a year ago i told someone i was away on an island taking part in Survivor. literally, literally.

a year ago on this night i was in the room with 4 others sorting out 50 copies (or more).

a year ago my heart remained lower than low.

a year ago the possibility that it would be a day shorter gave me the hope to carry on.

a year ago i had to learn humility, the hard way.

a year ago i learnt that in life, if we've got to do it, we've got to do it.

yesterday,

i was sniffing unconsciously, and someone went out to fetch a cup of warm water for me.

"you're having a flu right? i heard you sniffing, so i got water for you. it's warm."

today,

someone did something for the first time, and boy did i smile. on my face and in my heart. :)

2006-11-30T00:59:00.000-08:00

nearing the end of my exams, the culminated stress resulted in a big red pimple on my cheek. everyone told me it was a mosquito bite, but i insisted it was a pimple, and continued applying bouts of pimple cream.

but everyone kept telling me it was a mosquito bite, i came to a point where i was slowly wondering if it really was a mosquito bite. then, i didn't know whether to apply pimple cream or mopiko.

and now that the red... thing is slowly subsiding, it looks like a dimple when i smile or laugh.

it's a chameleon, it is.

2006-11-29T13:19:00.000-08:00

TESTING! :D

2006-11-27T09:10:00.000-08:00

last sem's project.

what memories man. :D

The Carrot Carma

2006-11-26T09:16:00.000-08:00

what a stretch of 15 weeks it has been.

it's been the most eventful semester i've ever lived through, in every sense of the word. throw me a linear editing machine and i'll show you how to mark in, mark out, auto-edit. tell me about McDonaldization, Coca-colonization, and i'll reply you with Orientalism. ask me who i want to meet and i'll say he who rode a unicycle whilst juggling balls down the hallways of MIT.

in a few weeks i had to figure out 4 programmes from scratch. boy it wasn't easy, like how i spent 2 hours just figuring out how to automatically paginate my 12 pages, or how trying to figure out the roll-over effects made me literally want to just roll over and over and over.

but i've got so many good memories to leave me feeling warm and fuzzy. like how we randomly trotted up to the rooftop to lie down and busk under the sun, or how i bought a slice of tiramisu just because i wanted to eat tiramisu at the benches. my secret little piece of Maldives in school, and my favourite stretch of road. my favouritest quiet conversations, and those deep soul searching ones. my swims during lessons, that yummy crystal jade lunch which started my xiao long bao fettish.

ooh how can i forget the beginning of it all, with the windsurfing and the lindy hopping, all that ambition. and the *you know what* which got her saying "i've never seen tiff get so irritated". yep, i've found what i don't like to do.

it was all about school this sem, all about school. but more importantly, it was most about those school friends. :)

and because i've been so busy, i haven't had time to thank some people i really wanna thank so here goes!

"you look hungry, do you want some popcorn?"

love the entire set up, love the movie, love the poster (which i will frame), love you people.

"...this is our last chance to try and make this day special."

believe me, you did. :)

the stack of paper plates are still on my table. whenever i look through them, i smile. and your cheesecake and ice-cream kept me company during those lonesome nights of studying.

thanks so much so much so much. thinking bout it makes my heart smile la. :)

our mini class reunion

where nic was free so amal brought him and ching was free so nic brought her and later when we bumped into jaron randomly. haha. thanks for the bag and the time. thanks amal for wanting to spend my birthday with me! :)

of pizzas on the 4th floor and surprise!!!!!

yum! the pizzas were the best thing to keep me going the night before 227 deadline. and i ate so much didn't i? ;)

thanks, you, for missing the screening of some videos just to collect the pizzas, and thanks to you all for the effort and the thought and the bag and the goodies and the random postcard. heh.

and the scrapbooks, notebooks, presents, hugs and sms-es in between

thanks you all, i really do appreciate it. :) really really really.

thanks to everyone for making my gloomy work-infested, stress-overflowing birthday somewhat better. :)

2006-11-19T09:57:00.000-08:00

exam quick quick finish so i can eat calbee hot and spicy.

2006-11-15T11:08:00.000-08:00

"shall we mead for late lunch before paper tomorrow?"

"ok, but can't eat too much, lass i get sleepy."

"sigh, a few hours marx the beginning to our paper!"

brilliant brilliant brilliant. i like. :D

and a thought that keeps ringing in my mind:

tongues will wag like wiener wegs.

wish me luck!

2006-11-03T08:40:00.000-08:00

so much work until must ice ice baby.

2006-10-30T09:36:00.000-08:00

that which made me smile after a long tiring day:

1. when the automatic flush in the toilet worked - made me feel like i was cared for

2. when she told me "the best things come in small packages" :)

3. when i reached home and to my surprise was greeted by the flower on my bag - happily sewn back on and looking very pretty. :)))

one year ago i was in hall studying.

one year ago things were not quite the same.

one year ago i didn't know you.

believe it or not, i still get a new surprise each time i look at my reflection. it has never really sunk in that i'm so small. maybe it's because i see myself as bigger.

2006-10-29T10:01:00.000-08:00

1. the funniest thing i heard today: aiya everyone in the 201 textbook are friends! i feel like creating friendster for them so i'll know who's linked to who!

2. the nicest sounding phrase i heard today: terence how are your parents?

3. the most useful things i received this week: rulers and rulers and rulers. ;)

4. the sweetest things i received today: Apple, Nutrisoy, Garlic, Egg mcmuffin, Longans in a can. :)))

5. the cheekiest person today: yes you sanji* :D

6. the word of the season: ascribe

7. my heroine of the week: she who endured 24 hours without sleep. :)
8. the voices of the night: Spice Girls and N'Sync and Boyzone and Aqua and Backstreet Boys.

9. my all-time favourite game: Angel and Mortal. giving is better than winning.
10. the best poem goes to:

See how the birds fly, how

The wind blows. Like the

First bloom of flowers. I write a

Letter on this perfect day, to tell

Of my joy.

Each new season is an

Object of my affection.

haha best la. i give A++++++. for all the effort, all the thought, all all the love. woo! ;)

2006-10-27T09:24:00.000-07:00

she said,

in this world, there's a bunch of people i love very much. but i've learnt that the greater the love, the greater the disappointment. but as with all things in life, i can't help it. no, not the disappointment. i just can't help loving them.

-My Rendezvous with Magnets

2006-10-22T07:58:00.000-07:00

this afternoon i went to hougang mall for the first time in... probably never, for a project meeting. on the way i bumped into 2 friends i haven't seen for 2 years. they were both from jc, both from my orientation group. i found out one was going to ORD on nov 5, then realised that means a whole lot of other people i know would be ORDing on that day too.

remember remember, the 5th of november.

2006-10-21T09:27:00.000-07:00

1. i feel satisfied and dandylions-happy when:

- i finally get to satisfy my xiao long bao craving

- i finally get to watch Little Red Flowers

- i find out i'm going to get a yummy goody-bag

2. i get really upset when:

- i buy a bag i really like and the flower drops out soon after

- when i'm satisfying my craving for xiao long baos and the skin breaks and the soup leaks

- when i finally get to watch Little Red Flowers in anticipation and i sit near a talkative woman who wonders her questions and comments aloud, and when parents bring rowdy kids into the show

3. someone made me tingling-happy today. :)

4. i appreciate wit, quirks, initiative, and, responsibility.

5. i want to be appreciated, loved, and affirmed.

6. i've never had more fun with Connect Four than today.

7. i can't seem to hide my emotions - they're written all over my face.

8. i'm starting to feel the stress and mounting work.

9. i'm a free spirit, please don't stifle me.

10. we realised we were all intrapersonal. then i wondered if that was why we hang out so little - cos we're always isolated talking to ourselves instead.

11. i like chinese culture. i read chinese autobiographies, and i watch chinese art films.

12. discernment is probably the best weapon to bring around: above all, grant me wisdom

13. i keep losing my rulers since primary school. plastic, metal, extendable, hello kitty. it's irritating.

14. i just bought myself a nice turquoise pencil and i can't stop using it.

15. it's time i start planning things for myself by myself.

16. i can't wait to get started on the book i bought. probably in 5 weeks' time.

17. of doing the right thing and putting in 100% and more - no regrets.

18. i'm looking forward to their return so i can belong.

19. everyone wants to do well, but not everyone wants to do what it takes to do well.

20. i wore boots today and she told me, "i like tall tiff." hey, me too. ;)

2006-10-19T09:18:00.000-07:00

my blog has a bug. :(

if i didn't have a gazillion things to do i would create a new account and move but... no. because i have a gazillion things to do.

if there's one thing i'm learning, it's to accept honesty and criticisms in love. there's an unexplainable love-hate feeling when someone hurts you with the truth about yourself. i like it how she said, "very blatant, but i can take it."

there's nothing more important than communication, and i'm not just saying that cos i'm a communications student.

i like being in university. i really do.

there's a queer sense of security knowing i can do basic flash (the program!!!) and dreamweaver. and i know how to unlock database giant Oracle. someone hire me already!

s said, "the next few weeks are gonna be interesting for you." not because of work, but because of because. top secret stuff. hohoho.

i'm so proud of you, and you know it. :)

this morning a brown slimy slinky thing was on someone's shirt in lecture. he flicked if off nonchalently. i tried to act nonchalent too even though he was only 2 seats away from me. i succeeded for a while, but instantly caved in to whines and squeaks and cringes when it appeared on my bag. yucks. :S

after lec, v told her story of how she, in her "sleepy slumber state" in the morning got into the wrong car thinking it was her dad. hohoho.

after lunch, s called me and told me the funniest situation ever. she went to look for a tutor in the tutor's room and her tutor's both shoes broke at the same time, one after the other. but because the tutor had a class to run to, s had to lend her slippers to her tutor as her tutor rushed off to class and s was stranded in the tutor's room. so the call was a plea of help for anyone - anyone at all to lend her some footwear. she called the whole wide world and in the end got hold of someone who could drive to hall to get her a pair of slippers. but the tutor came back with her slippers cos the tutor made her student go back to hall and get a pair of slippers. confused? just know that it whole thing was freaking hilarious. and a while later when people came out of class so many came up to s and asked "hey s you called me ah?" she really called the whole world. ;)

today i seem to be having more collisions that usual. like when i was walking out of the toilet and someone was coming out of the cubicle so she opened the door just when i was walking past. bang!

and then after i finished bathing i don't know why i just knocked into the shower door. bang!

pretty interesting day if you ask me.

school and bus rides and train rides just aren't the same without you. :) come back soon!

2006-10-18T09:19:00.000-07:00

it's a wonder how it's smokin' everywhere i go. literally and well, figuratively, if you like. ;) see there's the incessant haze, then there're the 2 smoking heaters which smoked only when i was bathing, and then today in school a fire broke out and there was pretty much smoke. and nat came running to me full of excitement and asked if my smoking heater was somewhere near the fire. i somehow got the connection, and i somehow didn't. but it was humourous nontheless to see how excited nat was when she was running across. ;)

about the fire in school, it was probably the teeny-weeny excitement we all needed to spark that extra bit of adrenaline to last us to the exams, and after. i learnt the true spirit of journalism as i sat on the bench watched them run about more than excitedly with their notebooks and pens in tow, not forgetting the snap-snap cameras and the film-film cameras. and i thought to myself, this is what it means to be a journalist. i don't think i was born to be one.

it's been a pretty interesting week, a slow but steady recovery from the last. i love the random happenings, like how i wake up to a friend next to me on the train in the morning, and end up bumping into him again on the train back. how i thought i was totally wasting my time in a lecture, but ended up proven the wonders of technology yet again as i caught up with a friend from the other side of the world i thought i lost. and how i prided myself for being a true Singaporean for watching the ending of Maggie and Me, carried on to watch My Sassy Neighbour (and actually found it pretty funny), and ended with a re-run of Daddy's Girls. and i was tempted by the advertisement for the last season of Phua Chu Kang. this is how we display our national pride.

in the coming 3 weeks, i have a 12-page newspaper to put together, a flash-based and html-based website to complete, and a one minute video to conceptualise, film and complete. oh and i've got a few quizzes and tests sprinkled inbetween. woo!

2006-10-15T07:42:00.000-07:00

"i wish we were both around so you can tell me what's right and what's wrong and what's good and what's not. i wish we were both around so we can stay silent and watch the seas wave. come back soon."

2006-10-15T07:11:00.000-07:00

i think my tagboard is under siege.

i've won 3 awards this week.

1. best joke of the week: "i'm so hot, my heater started smoking!"

p.s. my new heater started smoking when i was bathing again. it's me la.

2. best analogy of the week: "mmm, i think biting a small hole in the skin of a xiao long bao and sucking the juice is like performing cpr on a person."

3. best birthday speech: " i have a speech. yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, today is a gift, that's why we call it the present. and now... it's time to present presents!!!"

hurhurhur.

:D

'tis the season of many firsts.

2006-10-11T09:58:00.000-07:00

zapping monsters into outerspace,

i'm gonna be a superhero.

2006-10-05T09:59:00.000-07:00

i seem to be having a special affinity with one person these few days. let's call her Mary.

earlier this week a senior walked into our lecture and loudly announced he found Mary's wallet. before he walked off, he didn't forget to add, "handicapped toilet", just so every single person in the entire lecture theatre would promptly know where Mary visited that day. ;)

after the lecture we bumped into Mary outside. we teased her about visiting you-know-where, leaving her wallet inside, and about the whole world now knowing she used the handicapped toilet. we parted ways and walked off. soon, Mary called me and asked if i was still in school: she left her jacket there.

the next day i saw Mary and learnt she found her jacket. another senior kept it for her. later in the afternoon, while i was sitting at a bench, someone randomly popped up and asked, "do you have Mary's number? a senior is looking for her." so in my head i'm thinking, wow this Mary is one popular girl this week.

today i was walking and another senior called out to me. "Hey do you know who's Mary? i found her thumbdrive in the computer lab."

Mary, Mary, Mary. i couldn't be more amused at our affinity.

just now when i was on my way out of school, my bus passed a bus-stop and i saw Mary there. i called her and told her i just passed her. and she said, "Hey you know actually just now i thought i lost my handphone, but luckily someone found it and returned it to me."

i told her,

"Mary, maybe you should start chaining everything to yourself."

2006-10-03T08:54:00.000-07:00

and so since the sun started to set today,

sooner or later finally happened, i've bared my soul about hypocrisy, wondered aloud over practicality vs morality, pained over friendship, and gone God la God in desperation. when i thought it was bad enough, i frowned in disbelief on you-probably-don't-know-what, was thrown into fuming madness, complained and complained and whined and whined and vented and vented to smallie laine in what she terms Freudian Free Association, calmed down, got started on it, and here i am.

and because so much happened in one night, i think i might take what a friend jokingly suggested on msn, seriously. i think i might just invite people over to my house one morning just so they can say, "Breakfast at Tiffany's".

because so much happened in one night.

2006-10-02T09:15:00.000-07:00

just now when i was bathing halfway, the heater started smoking. like, literally. white smoke started twirling out from it. and what else could i have done but shout, "muuummmmmyyyy!!! the heater is smoking!!!!"

holy smokes!

;)

2006-10-01T11:12:00.000-07:00

i was struck twice tonight by what my mum said. she told me that i had to clear out my old clothes if i keep buying new ones, or the cupboard will run out of space. simple fact, simple truth, but it hit me more than simply. then i wondered, would i have to get rid of the old intangible things as well to make place for the new? they are after all, intangible, no? they don't take up any physical space.

then my mum said, "throw away your old handphone boxes la. the handphone is gone but the box is still there."

ouch.

that's right, the handphone is gone. my handphone got stolen last year and it still hurts. it was a phone with a story and sentimental value man. pfft.

i'm past the half way mark, and what a 7-weeks it has been. i've learnt so much more than i ever thought i would. self discovery is an exciting process.

he said, the main thing stopping Christians today is not the devil, but a sense of complacency. she said, i see so much more potential in you. he said, be obedient and follow instructions. she said, what are you waiting for? he said, sometimes you look back on your life and you realise you've wasted some years. i think, i don't want to waste any.

i get excited thinking about some things. i get excited thinking of my revelations, our luckily's, and what is to come. more wonderful train rides, more cheeky drinks, more love to go around. we might just epitomise comfort in silence. ;)

when i wake up in the morning, i want more than just a blue sky

i want more

there's something powerful in wanting something. not many know what they want. and the journey to finding out, is probably better than the wanting itself.

2006-09-14T09:35:00.000-07:00

i think i have the best dad in the world la. he sent this email to my sis and me. :)

Hi girls,

It seems to me that each morning it is quite a mad rush for you girls to just wash up and get ready to leave the house either to go to your office or for classes. Has it ever occur to you girls that you hardly have time to pray, read meditate, read God's words or commit the day to the Lord? Open the attachment and you will know what I mean. God bless!

Love
Dad

:))))))

2006-09-13T07:53:00.000-07:00

it's that season in school.

when i hear her behind me exclaim, "oh my gosh i have 4 tests this week?!", or see a usually bubbly self walk around with a visibly preoccupied mind, quiet and subdued, or listen to her list out all the deadlines next week, or simply just not see people turn up in class.

other than that, Smallies United officially brought our jackets on tuesday, smalley vice-pres gave me my much longed-for Florida's Natural sweets-in-a-carton (which i bring around everywhere and even refilled), j and i created 2 names of the day, nat almost took my first, and shu and i struck it right the first time. :D

2006-09-09T11:45:00.000-07:00

school's been hectic recently, but i'm glad we're all going through it together.

when i'm stressed with work, the song plays and she tells me to Breathe.

when she's having the worst day of her life, i tell her to turn to Hallmark - Life isn't all Ha Ha Hee Hee.

it's great how we keep both ends of the spectrum nicely in balance. or at least, try to. :)

through all that jazz and all that stress, i remind myself to not get caught up in the small little things and forget the big picture. i try to remember to soak in whatever's left of school in my life's journey, to enjoy and have fun. because frankly, though i may whine about the work load, frown about the deadlines, complain about how-do-i-do-this, i still love how things in school are turning out.

and so that late night in school i sat at the benches taking a break from the assignment, reminding myself yet again not to forget, not to forget. i looked at all the masters students clustered in groups, seriously discussing about their projects, and i wondered if i'd ever be one of them in future.

but as my mind drifted off, i wondered, who would be so highly qualified to teach these master students?

then i got it.

ahh... it's got to be the grand master.

2006-09-03T09:40:00.000-07:00

"Where did you go last night?"

"Laviva."

"Huh? Where's that?"

"Near the Best Money Changer la!"

cheers to our absolutely random night when we crashed a dnd, counted the steps to the front door, each had our secret bring-you-there place, and soaked in Saturday Night Fever with cheeky drinks. ;)

spread the love!

it felt like christmas in church yesterday cos i had santa grace and santa rach bless me with gifts. which, of course, made me very happyyyyy. :D thanks grace for the many many many gifts(i say this on behalf of everyone)! you're so awesome man. :) and thanks rach for your love gifts. i *lub* *lub*!! ;)))

you said it right, the past few weeks have seen many gifts given and taken. and here's a thanks for the gifts, and thanks to the many yous i've been blessed with. :)thanks for the home-baked brownie, for the letter with the pretty design, and the little cute test-tube. thanks for the turquoise top all the way from bangkok. thanks for the cd which put a smile on my face. thanks for the goggles and the case which gave me energy to live through the day. thanks for the link which entitled me to a limited edition. thanks for the book and the thermoplastic mug which sits happily on my table.

i love it when it rains in school, when i can zip up and wear my jacket around the whole day as though i'm clad in fashionable winter wear. when i can use the tip of my shoe to trace a letter on the wet roads, and see mist hanging low amongst the never-ending greenery. when we rush to buy hot drinks to keep ourselves warm, when we realise the rain has brought the smell from the chocolate factory to our doorstep. i love it when it rains in school.

2006-08-29T06:48:00.000-07:00

a much loved friend gave me a book recently. not too many nights ago, i read,

"Those who are inherently grateful do better at lasting the distance."

Give thanks for something today, then make it a habit - you'll be amazed at the outcome

- The Power to go the Distance

last night before i slept, i prayed to have a little more gratitude in me. this morning when i woke, i reminded myself to be grateful for the little things in life.

it didn't take much to sincerely give thanks. early in the morning admist the snaking queues and sleepy eyes, a "this is for you" was enough to last through the tiring day and longer. and my absolute amusement at "i realised it didn't have a casing, so i bought you one." babe, this is your honourary mention. can't thank you enough. :)

smiles also to my other smallie who fed me happy during tutorial and lecture with yummy ginger snaps and addictive japanese sweets. and for the offer to accompany me during my lonely break by chatting to me on msn, whilst she was in lecture. :)

and to the auntie at mos burger who asked me whether i wanted another drink when she saw i was sitting alone for a long time with a finished one.

and val who apologised for not being able to accompany me during the break cos she was *ahem* comfortably sleeping in her hall. ;)

today i took an extra look at life, and realised that the many bright car lights zooming along at night actually makes quite a beautiful sight. (hey rong'er i rhymed 4 times in this sentence. HAHA.)

tonight before i sleep, i will pray to have a little more gratitude in me. tomorrow when i wake, i will reminded myself to be a little more grateful for the little things in life.

take a look at the ordinary

don't need to look for paradise

you could be next to an angel in disguise.

every day can be legendary

every minute a pleasant surprise

you could be next to an angel in disguise.

there's never too much lovin' to go around.

2006-08-27T08:16:00.000-07:00

it's been an eventful week.

this week, i:

-swam laps inbetween lessons

-lounged on land amidst water

-gave and was given

-lindy hop-ed
-participated and contributed, however little, in the buzzing excitement of the-night-before-newspaper-production

-attempted windsurfing (read: did not even surf, kept falling after painfully getting the mast up)

-won amazing race

:D

it's our peak now

2006-08-23T09:51:00.000-07:00

even though it's been a long day, i'm tired, it's late at night, gotta wake up real early, another long day tomorrow, i still wanna spend some time remembering those quirky little things the past 2 days. ;)

of yesterday's weirds

.newsworthy.

i could have been in 2 pieces of breaking news yesterday! on my way to school in the morning the train suddenly jerked to a stop while it was slowing down at a station. staff at the train station rushed out, walkie-talkies were whipped out, and soon a man who looked high and a little unstable was taken away by the arm. apparently, as i think i overheard from the buzzing walkie-talkies, he was standing on the edge of the platform. exciting news to perk me up in the morning.

then at night whilst shuz and i were in JP for dinner, we reached the basement and wondered why our visions were so blurred and the air was smoky. we looked and realised security guards were around, an area was marked off, and a fire seemed to have broken out but successfully put out. what queer events to start and end my day with.

.sillies.

someone campaigning for the post of president passed around a bucket of sweets during lecture. to my absolute excitement, the brand of the sweets was Tiffany. yep you heard it right. my name was printed nicely on every single shiny sweet wrapper. i kept my sweet wrapper proudly, and felt like i was keeping a prize possession, like that of a shrivelled up lizard i found in the garden. oh wells i'm definitely voting for him. hee hee. :D

while shuz and i were walking i felt my phone vibrating continuously. i searched for it in my bag and took it out.

me: shuz! you're calling me again!

shuz: oh i didn't lock my phone again!

and the funniest part was, i actually answered the call. don't ask me why man, i was wondering myself. geee!!!!!!

while buying sweets in Watson, i couldn't decide which flavour to get so i asked shuz.

me: which should i get? mint or peppermint?

shuz: hmmm...

me: oh by the way did you know that mint kills your sperms??

shuz: er.... ok.

me: oh wells just thought you should know.

shuz: but how would you know how sperms taste anyway?

me: ..... (and then i didn't realise i raised my volume quite considerably)
HUH? i said mint kills your sperms! not tastes like sperms!!!

and as we burst into a fit of wild laughter, i saw a male head pop up from the other side of the shelf. and shuz just had to end off with, "oops Freudian Slip!!" hahaha. :D

.art and life.

val and i spent yesterday afternoon lazing by the pool during our 4 hour break. we swam for half an hour before the guy chased us out cos of pool maintenance. so we just sat by the side (in the shade of course), talked, thought, dried off, and before we knew it the guy was finished with pool maintenance. that was how long we sat at the side. and so i continued swimming. :D :D the chirpy endorphins very promptly kicked in for the lecture later.

*

i heard the most hilarious line up of songs on the train ride back. again, it had me bursting out in giggly laughter. nice musical, nice musical. ;)

and the question of the day: if your life had a theme song, what would it be?

of today's laughs

.cakes and flakes.

i bought a piece of Tiramisu cake after lunch and had it packed in a plastic box. it slipped from my hand but i managed to catch it before it fell to the ground. when i checked to see if the cake was alright, i was confused for a moment, cos it looked like a totally different cake. well, you see, all the cocoa powder on the top flaked off and i was turning the box all around to look for the brown top coating of the cake. which, made it even worse. we were so amused at the terribly bad (and blatant) quality of the cake that we were still laughing about it long after.

but that's not all. it was only a few hours later that i ate my cake, and after discussing how the cake would have melted into soup by then, a new term was coined: Tirami-soup. oh dear dear dear. :D and yes, for the record, it was soupy. but still nice nontheless!

.greener pastures.

we found the loveliest, most peaceful, most artistic place on campus. for now, that is. while discussing exciting plans to make full use of this place, nat happily suggested sprawling on the sloping green grass under the big blue sky.

shuz: oh yes! i'll bring snacks!

me: oh, snacks? i thought you'll bring snags. (read: Sensitive New Age Guys)

hahahahaha. ;)

2006-08-20T08:07:00.000-07:00

i often find myself stumbling unknowingly into yet a new method of momentary therapeutic escape. like finding my little piece of maldives. or the weird feeling of omnipotence during animation class when i could create unlimited stars in the night sky. too easy to be true. or the wacky fusion of sticky bubbles, a live band, loud music, energy, and cool friends who are as fascinated with 'em bubbles as me. today was my most fun experience with bubbles. i think i can blow bubbles my whole life. wee hee hee. ;D

i had a yummilicious cake during lunch today, thanks to rach rach rach! it was simply yum-o! we came to a queer conclusion that it's a girlie cake cos none of the guys liked it. but all the better cos that only leaves us more of the cake to finish. YUM. (((: i can feel myself slipping into yet another period of my intensive food cravings. delicate cakes are gonna be my new best friend. weehee!

the past 2 weeks of school have been good. better than good, i would say. i remember passing a comment of "school has never been this fun" somewhere along the way. i hope that stays.

2nd year started off with a bundle of nice memories, a good way to begin a fresh page. the 2 hour talk over lunch, the race between legs and wheels, the lovely bus and train rides, our sudden moments of epiphanies, the cartoon and the looneys, my secret hideout, the beautiful ladies, and all the things inbetween. :)

i seem to have a special affinity with buses and trains (bus interchanges too!). the random people i've bumped into on these modes of transport have turned out to have not-so-random places in my life. ;) and it was on the train that i got my sudden moment of epiphany that's impressively cleared the air and brought the light. so maybe this travelling thing is suited for me after all.

wo zhang da le

you know you've grown up, or, are growing up, when you find yourself having a genuine interest to watch the national day rally and able to be kept interested for the whole 1.5 hours. the search for intellectual stimulation, i say.

everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades

never ending, your glory goes beyond all fame
and the cry of my heart
is to give you praise
from the inside out
oh my soul cries out after you.

2006-08-17T07:38:00.000-07:00

yes.

yes, there was that unexplainable gleeful pleasure - of forming friendly yellow stars on a black background at the click of a mouse. as many, as i pleased.

yes, the spirit was free. gliding through the gently sun-lit water, parting the rays and the waves.

yes, oh those sudden epiphanies. the children of my mind go wild.

yes, my little piece of heaven, my secret place of paradise.

yes, it's beautiful to stroll home in the night wind listening to 'em songs. kudos to sim for spreading the love.

yes, of sisterhood, chill chicken/pork/crab, wwed, and elusive edwina. special mention to those smiling eyes in the morning, with perk-me-ups better than coffee.

yes, of stepping out and growing up. hold my hand babe, you're not the only one.

yes. of zen and men.

2006-08-09T01:44:00.000-07:00

first day of school, was a typical first-day-of-school. introductions, going through the syllabus, ground rules, etc etc etc. it was the first lecture of the new year, and already my feelings were cheated. the lecturer said he'd end earlier than the stipulated time, but he didn't. :<

and the only 2 constructive things i took away from that lecture were "metacognition", and, "buy the book".

because there're no tuts in week 1, we had a 6.5 hour break to kill.

i could have gone home, slept for 2 hours, and came back.

i could have eaten lunch, watched 2 movies, and had high tea.

i could have flown to australia!!!

i could have gone to malaysia and shopped.

but i never stepped a single step out of ntu in that 6.5 hours. we: ate a macdonald's breakfast, talked and talked and talked bout tv shows after breakfast, toured the cca fair, sat down for a drink, travelled to the computer lab, read magazines, and then 6.5 hours flew by.

it was funny yesterday how no one wanted to take my money. shuz bought a drink for me and didn't want me to pay her, cherrie bought strepsils for me and didn't want my money, and jessie, who bought panadol and water for me, didn't take my cash either. haha. thanks girls. :)

i've watched a couple of movies recently, but i think the sweetest 3 lines have got to be this:

"first kiss time?"
"will you still love me in the morning?"
"forever and ever babe."

2006-08-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

finally.

i finally worked out today after a long, long, time. netball today was good fun, i enjoyed myself. :) thanks for the great time guys and gals! now my legs are aching but it's all worth it! it feels so good to exercise and feel the sweat under the sun, and i've forgotten how fun netball is.

i finally managed to semi-catch-up with you over oceans and seas. it was great babe, it was great. :) i love you loads, and you hang in there. you've blessed me so much, now it's my turn to be there for you.

i've finally found her who can teach me what, guide me where, show me how. tee hee hee. ;)

school is finally starting ain't it? it's finally starting. i'm not all that dreading it, cos i've got great friends to hang out with. am looking forward to seeing you gals back in school! ooh goodbye parkway, hello jurong point.

there are 2 funnies/sillies of today:

1. me wrongly passing the ball to andy

2. wishing a wrong happy birthday because of msn. tee hee hee hee hee!!! :D

2006-08-05T12:50:00.000-07:00

i've missed hanging out with my girlfriends.

and today, i came to a conclusion. girlfriends are a blessing. but girlfriends who can sing, are an added bonus. :)

today we saw a live band with a female lead. she was wearing an oversized jersey with a short denim skirt. it was hilariousssss how we separately thought of the exact same thing: she looked like she just came from her boyfriend's place. hahaha. :D

i bumped into jayne, sha, ching and jan last night, and i bumped into amal and agong tonight. how queer is that?

i want to see miracles, see the world change

2006-07-30T11:41:00.000-07:00

i think i invented the funniest pick-up line today. ;)

Leon you're so tall, you're like the Eiffel Tower!

-stunned silence in the lift-

when we were moving the musical equipment back to church after DOC, some adults at the lift lobby asked us where we came from. and someone blurted out,

"Swee Lee sale."

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

(i don't think they were very amused though. but I WAS!!!!)

I.O.N.U.

have a good trip rhord. :)